Loneliness
by Aqua111
Summary: A short story about Kaya-Na's feelings after she lost Iskander. And a talk with Xenin.


Loneliness. Since he was gone she felt it quite often. Of course there were still her friends and the other members of the Dark Legion but no one of them could ever fill the hole Iskander had left.

Kaya-Na looked at the clock. It was 2 am. Most Legionnaires aside of these on guard duty were probably already asleep and she should be in her bed too. Instead she spent her time in the library with old books and maps. She rubbed her burning eyes. Actually it didn't matter where she was because she knew it would be just another restless night, one of many that she had since the days of war in the canyon - since she had lost him. Carefully she folded a map and put it back on the staple where it had been before. He once had read all these books, learned all these maps by heart. As one of the best scouts of the Legion he had to be informed about all the different cultures and landscapes on Mobius. She didn't need all these information, sometimes she didn't even read anything and just blankly stared at the pages. All that mattered was that once he had held them in his hands.

Iskander was dead... Lien-Da, Xenin and Remington had been the only ones of her team back then who had witnessed how Kragok had killed him - or better said how Finitevus had done it since Kragok was under his control. At first she barely had realised it but when the fights and the adrenaline rush were over and the message had enough time to sink in the pain came. While she was on duty she remained calm and collected - a professional Legionnaire as usual - but the rest of the day and especially the night hours gave her too much time to think and remember. Too much time for her tears.

Kaya-Na left the room and walked through the empty corridors. Where should she go to? Not her room - in there she felt even lonelier than in a deserted corridor. Besides she only would walk through it restlessly anyways and in that case hallways were the better choice for long walks.

When she turned around a corner she saw that she wasn't alone. Xenin stood in the middle of the corridor and stared out of the window. What was he doing here that late at night? As far as she could remember his shift wouldn't start until several hours later. He lightly turned around when he heard someone coming closer but then quickly turned away again.

"You are still awake?" he asked. His voice sounded strangely rough.

"The same I wanted to ask you. Is everything okay?"

"You haven't heard about it yet? The last team Lien-Da led ... they are already two days overdue. And three days ago we lost contact to them." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before speaking again. "I should have accompanied them but thanks to a malfunctioning Chaos Core I had to stay in the labs. It's unforgiveable that I stayed back just because of a bit internal pain while Lien-Da - and also the rest of the team - could have needed me."

Kaya-Na had heard about that. His Chaos Core now caused internal organs to overreact or even stop - just for a few milliseconds at the current time then they continued working as usual but the problem could have become a real threat if they hadn't taken care of it immediately. Actually Xenin only had gone to the labs because Lien-Da had insisted on it. Not even a heart attack would be enough reason for him to leave her side.

"That could mean anything", Kaya-Na said. "Maybe it's just her communicator that got damaged. Or they had to take another route back and temporarily are out of reach."

"Kragok sent another scout team to the last place we had contact with them", Xenin answered. "They only found a destroyed camp. What if she is already dead by now?"

"I'm sure she is still alive. No one simply attacks a Dark Legion camp because it's there. That was on purpose. And when it was on purpose they surely have noticed that a Grandmaster was among the Legionnaires. If they had killed her they also would have made sure it didn't stay unnoticed. No, I think in the worst case she is held captive and either she is able to get free on her own or we will get her out but she will return for sure."

'Unlike someone else who never will return anymore', her brain added but she tried to shove these thoughts she had tried to ban out of her mind for the last few minutes away again.

For some time they silently stood side by side staring at the window though probably neither of them was actually looking at what was going on outside. Then Xenin suddenly said, "I never had the chance to thank you."

She gave him a surprised look. "What for?"

"For giving me that little kick I needed. Without you I never would have admitted my feelings for Lien-Da. Thanks for listening to my stupid little problems back then and kicking my ass although you had losses to suffer on your own."

"Sometimes you just have no other choice than staying strong", Kaya-Na answered. It had been Lien-Da in disguise back then and not her but Lien-Da had told her about it later on, just in case Xenin would ever mention it. She also was glad that the Grandmaster hadn't sent her because at that time she probably only would have burst into tears while talking to Xenin.

"I'm sure she will return", she repeated. "Then the ... then the pain will be over."

Xenin turned his head and looked into her eyes. "And your pain? Will it ever be over too?"

"No, probably not. But I will learn to bear it."


End file.
